LARGEST FAT BEAR WEEK EVER FEATURES 16 BEARS GOING FOR THE CROWN

Katmai National Park released the Fat Bear Week bracket Friday, and the field is 16 bears instead of the usual 12. The reason is a baby boom. The park says a record 19 bear families and 37 cubs turned up at Brooks River this summer, which broke the format. Fat Bear Junior, the separate cub bracket, is not happening in 2026. The kids just compete alongside their mothers in the main draw now. Defending champ is Bear 32, cleverly named Chunk, who took last year's final 96,350 votes to 63,725 over Bear 856. He did it after breaking his jaw in June 2025, likely in a fight with another bear. Over the summer he barely bothered showing up at the river, then arrived in September with a belly hanging low enough that nobody needs to ask if was eating. Chunk is also the bear who went after two of Grazer's cubs in 2024 sending them went over the falls. One of those cubs died... voters did not care. The bracket scores fat, not character. One new face this year is Bear 89, Backpack, son of 2019 champion Holly, nicknamed for riding on his mom's back after an injury as a cub. Voting runs September 22 through 29, noon to 9 p.m. Eastern, with no weekend ballots, no one and no bear is getting in the way of Roger Goodell's TV rights.

Why you should give a shit: A record 37 cubs means the salmon run is doing its job, so enjoy the one American election where the fattest, least principled candidate winning is actually the correct outcome.